Editor’s Note: The idea of Donald Trump as the most powerful person in the Free World is certainly a scary one. I didn’t like Trump when he was a Democrat, and I don’t like him any better now. However, because there is no god, and because we Americans aren’t nearly as smart as we like to think we are, I think there’s a better than 50-50 chance that he’s our next president. Sometimes, there’s just nothing you can do, and the worst alternative plays out.


Accepting the Inevitable

 

President Trump. I’m trying out the phrase to see how it looks on paper. A year or even six months ago, I never would have believed such a thing possible. Now, it appears we’ll be seeing it way too often. Who’d have guessed it?

Who knew the phrase “he’s one of us” would be applied to a billionaire who was born a millionaire and inherited his dad’s company? One of George W. Bush’s strengths was being seen as a working-class guy (he wasn’t) you could relax over a beer with (you couldn’t ... W was a recovering alcoholic). But even if Trump did drink beer (he doesn’t), a night of brews and braggadocio with The Donald would be exhausting. (He’s the kind of guy who could strut while sitting on a barstool.)

Who knew the phrase “the only adult in the room” would become a disqualifier? Trump never served in the military, yet he mocked POW John McCain’s heroism; he’s humorlessly cruel to the handicapped, he called a humanitarian Pope “disgraceful” and he blamed 9/11 on his own party’s last president. Nonetheless, when he’s crass, mean-spirited and petulant, his sycophants praise him for being “politically incorrect” and for “speaking his mind.”

Has any politician ever required so much Teflon? He delights the Republican base by slandering Mexicans as drug dealers and rapists, and has proposed shutting down mosques and banning Muslims from airlines, adopting what can only be described as a casual attitude toward the religious freedoms set forth in the Constitution. And his response to endorsements from white supremacists like David Duke could charitably be classified as ambivalent. Yet his Teflon suit remains unscathed.

 

 

In theory, Americans hate flip-floppers, but Trump’s followers aren’t even slightly disturbed that he was recently a liberal, but has now spun 180 degrees on everything from gun control and abortion to Hillary Clinton. He even inspires flip-flopping among his adversaries: Chris Christie repeatedly claimed Trump wasn’t qualified to be president, before perching on his shoulder like a sad, obese and obsequious parrot. He’s likely to end up battling fellow endorser and vice presidential “wannabe” Ben Carson for a job.

Opponents, particularly Ted Cruz (whom Trump refers to as “Lyin’ Ted”), are now emulating Trump’s largely content-free campaign rhetoric to the point that “liar” is barely a pejorative. Now that being fact-free and refusing to answer questions have become virtues, Cruz has insinuated, without a shred of proof, that Trump is withholding his tax returns to hide his Mafia ties, and that media outlets (which Cruz won’t identify) are holding back Trump exposés that they’ll release once he’s the GOP nominee.

The first accusation is merely wild, unsubstantiated innuendo. The second, which has the added benefit of sliming the “mainstream media” (who are anathema to the Right), is patently false. Anyone familiar with journalists knows they’d never sit on a hot story for months, because of the fear of being scooped by another reporter … but what’s one more lie?

Thanks to The Donald, these have been the best primaries ever. When the size of one’s manhood becomes campaign fodder, that’s entertainment! Based on his treatment of Megyn Kelly and Carly Fiorina, one can only wonder how low the level of discourse will sink once Trump is demeaning a Democratic woman. Nothing will be off limits, because anything that insults Hillary — or Obama, or any other liberal for that matter — is just fine with conservatives, no matter how mean-spirited, tasteless, irrelevant or dishonest.

The late comic George Carlin once said, “Think how stupid the average person is, and realize, by the definition of ‘average,’ half of them are stupider than that.” This bodes well for Trump’s electability. Besides, a Stony Brook University statistical model that’s been wrong only once since 1912 gives Trump a 97% chance of beating Hillary.

Trump has said, “I can be more presidential than anybody,” but it’s hard to imagine the Trump Administration (I can’t believe I just typed that) working up the seriousness and dedication to actually “make America great again.” And why would a president who got elected by being deliberately unpresidential suddenly be stricken with gravitas?

With a damaged Hillary Clinton inspiring so little enthusiasm on the Left, chances look slim that we’ll see a female president before 2021 or 2025. However, a Trump presidency could open the door for our second reality-show chief executive (and first female) in 2021 or 2025 — President Kardashian, along with First Spouse Kanye West (the black Donald Trump).

By 2017, newscasters will be saying things like:

  • “President Trump concedes Mexico won’t pay for the wall on our southern border; however, it is funding the tunnels being dug under it.”

  • “The Supreme Court has ruled the Muslim travel ban unconstitutional; President Trump has responded by calling Chief Justice Roberts ‘a loser’ and implying his birth in the former Soviet Union should disqualify him from SCOTUS.”

  • “President Trump has delayed the round-up and deportation of 11 million immigrants, pending confirmation of his first Supreme Court nominee — Sarah Palin.”

Democrats, and even some Republicans, are already issuing apocalyptic warnings about President Trump, accompanied by the customary promises to “move to Canada.” Can we stipulate now that none of us, not even Ted Cruz, will be relocating in Toronto in 2017?

 

Despite candidate Trump’s campaign rhetoric, this is still the greatest country in the world, even without a demagogue to make it great again. America has survived Warren G. Harding, James Buchanan and George W. Bush. We’ll survive President Trump.


Click here to return to the Mark Drought home page.